324: C324 Tell a Joke

C324 Tell a Joke

3In the blink of an eye, it was the day of the training. During the three days of training, close to a hundred participants had come, most of them being the people in charge of each newspaper's Operating Departments.

In the three day meeting, the leaders took up half of the day's worth of speeches. The leaders of the city committee's Ministry of Propaganda s, the leaders of the registration association, and a portion of the newspaper's leaders took up a day and a half to exchange their experiences. The leaders of all the related organizations took up a part of the day and a half of the leaders of the related organizations took up their speeches.

The experts' lesson was something that had been invited from the province, and there were even some leaders from the provincial newspaper association. The leaders of the city committee's Ministry of Propaganda had come to listen to the lecture, and the leaders of the various newspapers had also participated.

Qiu Tong and I sat below the stage, listening with relish. The level of experts in the province was different from that in the city. Even though there were more theories than practice, I still had some gains. Qiu Tong also wrote down a whole book.

When it was almost time for my lecture, I took a look at the venue. Damn, quite a few people were dozing off again.

Damn it, I get a little doze when the first round comes, Cippi!

However, it was no wonder. After an entire day, they were all filled with these things. Who wouldn't be tired of them?

I saw that Qiu Tong was still full of energy. She whispered, "When I'm talking, you don't need to remember. Just listen!"

Qiu Tong put down her pen, pursed her lips and smiled at me. "Hero, what are you trying to stir up this time?"

I chuckled. "I'll let you know soon!"

At this moment, the conference host called my name and asked me to come up to give a lecture.

I strode onto the stage and sat down on my haunches, still warm from the previous lecturer, a woman who was less than fifty years old and dressed up. She was gone, leaving no breath, and I sat here, not smelling anything.

I sat on the stage and looked down. The venue was a mess, with the chairman and the head of the city council's Ministry of Propaganda sitting in the front row.

Seeing me go up, the chairman of the board of directors smiled and whispered a few words to the head of the department. The head of the department chuckled, laughed dubiously, and looked at me.

I think the chairman must have been telling the head of the department the dirty jokes I said in my last lecture.

This birdman, exposing my history in front of the head of the department.

I settled down, coughed my whole life, and began to talk.

Everyone here is an expert in business, only I am a nobody in Operating Departments. I boldly went up on stage today, and during these two battles, there was absolutely nothing to impart experience on, so I could only say that I was here to learn. My speech was very short, and after 10 minutes, everyone threw me off the stage. I explained confidently, "After listening to a whole day of lessons, everyone must be feeling tired. Since that's the case, let's first relax a bit. I'll tell a joke to everyone, alright?"

All of a sudden, the atmosphere in the venue became lively. Those who were dozing off cheered up, laughing while some people began to clap their hands.

The chairman and department head looked at each other and both of them laughed.

"This joke is a little dirty. I hope that vegetarian leader will pay attention to your appetite and not have your stomach turn." I said again.

"Haha …" Everyone in the hall burst into laughter.

Qiu Tong covered her mouth and smiled at me. Boss Ping grinned and laughed.

I began: "A man drives a market to sell pigs, it gets raining in the dark, he drives twenty pigs to a farmhouse to sleep. The young woman said: There is only one inconvenience in the house. The man said, Please, big sister, give it to the pig. The young woman said, All right, but there's only one bed in the house. The man said, I'll go to bed and give the pig another one. The young woman said, Agreed. The man in the middle of the night talked to the young woman. She wouldn't let me sleep on your bed. Give the pigs two, the man said. The young woman agreed, but she was not allowed to move.

Shortly after, the man couldn't help but beg, but the young woman refused. The man said, Give it to the pigs. The young woman agreed. The man moved and stopped eight times, but the woman asked why he did not move. The man said the pig was gone. The young woman whispered, "Why don't I give you the pig..." After dawn, the man whistled as he drove the 30 pigs, including the 10 pigs from the young woman's house, to the market. "

As soon as the joke was over, the whole hall exploded with laughter. Everyone was laughing so hard that the head of the department, chairman and Sun Dongkai were all grinning.

I didn't laugh, but watched the audience below laugh with all sorts of expressions and pursed lips.

When everyone quieted down, I said, "After listening to the joke, we can't laugh it off. Have you guys found any way to run this business?"

Everyone fell silent and looked at me.

I said: "To find out the potential needs of the user, early guidance and training of the user needs, so the resulting input is consistent with the law of development."

"Walla —" There was a clapping sound, and everyone nodded. The chairman and head of department looked at me admiringly.

I continued, "It's still the same story, but the version is different, so let me tell you this: The other man, knowing this, decided to do the same, so he sold the pigs, and when it was dark and the rain fell, twenty pigs were not sold, and he went to a farmhouse to sleep. The young woman said: There is only one inconvenience in the house. The man said, Please, big sister, give it to the pig. The young woman said, All right, but there's only one bed in the house. Man: I'll sleep in the bed too, and give the pig another one. Young woman: Agreed.

The man in the middle of the night said to the young woman, 'I'll sleep on your bed, but the young woman won't. Give the pigs two, the man said. The young woman agreed and requested that they do not move. Shortly after, the man couldn't help but beg, but the young woman refused. The man said, Give it to the pigs. The young woman agreed. The man moved and stopped eight times, but the woman asked why he did not move. The man said, It's over. The young woman was speechless... After dawn, the man went back home dejectedly.

The venue was once again filled with laughter. There were many people laughing while carrying doubtful gazes. They didn't know how I would sum it up this time.

I said: "It is also summed up in a sentence: to do business, to combine the size of the enterprise to make prudent investment, to guard against the breakage of the capital chain."

"Sharp!" The applause came again. Qiu Tong's face was red and she had been smiling all this time.

I noticed that she didn't use her notes.

I went on to say, "Another man learned of this and decided to do the same and learn his lesson. So he traded a pig for a Viagra. After dawn, the man whistled as he chased 38 pigs, including 18 pigs from the young woman's family, to the market. What did this mean? This is simple: in the process of doing business, if you get the help of financial capital, your ability to do business will multiply. "

The entire venue was filled with laughter and praises.

I continued: "More and more men know about this method, and Viagra's demand is dwindling to two or three pigs. This is what we all call inflation … By the time Viagra's price had risen to 16 pigs per pellet, the man had already entered the marginal cost. Apart from having confidence in his own ability and good wishes for the future, the actual pig flow had already reached zero …

But there were more and more boar men, the decision to sell Viagra, the expansion of production capacity, the introduction of a secondary Viagra, if you were short of a pig, as long as you promised to spend the night in the woman's room, you could borrow it, and when that was done you could make up for the pig money, which greatly boosted Viagra's sales. What is this? This is the kind of loan that we have to meet in our business so that companies can choose to borrow liquidity based on future earnings. "

Everyone smiled and nodded.

"When the news comes out, there are more and more swingers, and someone is looking for Viagra's. This project is great. We're going to turn it into a good fund to sell bonds, and you can share my earnings. What do you say?" The Viagra store thought it was good, so the company divided the men into three categories: one for the pig, one for the pig, one for the pig, one for the pig, and one for the bond without the pig at all.

Everyone was on the move, buying bonds from Viagra's. Viagra's business was too good, so it outsourced the bond sales to another company, and the company also made a fortune. The company grew larger and larger, and could even sell bonds out of the actual Viagra sales, bringing a huge cash gain for itself and Viagra.

What does that tell us? It is clear that in order to get their business operations to a better and higher level, professional people must do professional things and realize the operation from physical operation to capital so that the economy can enter a higher level. "

Everyone nodded as they listened.

"To prevent future losses on their bonds, the company decided to insure them, which would make it easier to sell, because in the event of a problem, they would get a repayment from the insurance company. Wow, the bond company is doing a great deal of selling, and the insurance company gets a huge amount of insurance without a reason," I said. This is risk hedging, a strategic alliance that increases the risk resistance of companies and protects consumers' interests. "

Qiu Tong listened intently, looking at me with admiration in her eyes.

"But," I continued, "later, when there were too many swinemen, and there were too many queues waiting, the young woman could not bear it. She said that I had given up and had moved out of sight."

Everyone burst into laughter again.

I said, "This is a particular phenomenon that we often encounter in the course of our business. It belongs to the normal fluctuation of the market and does not affect the whole economy... As a result, the young woman has not been heard from. A portion of the men who owed the pigs had no income, so they could only renege on their debt. As a result, a large amount of bonds had expired, but they were unable to cash the pigs.

This is the so-called subprime crisis, but it doesn't affect the financial sector as a whole... However, when the insurance company saw that the bonds were insured, it also declared its failure. This was the so-called financial crisis, but it would not affect the entire real economy...

Things are getting worse. Pig men and bond companies, insurance companies are declaring bankruptcy and cutting wages, further affecting the related consumption. Clothes, beverages, food factories, domestic service companies, car factories, film companies, etc. This is the financial crisis. What was the final conclusion of the story? Sigh, this was truly the most malicious of women! All of them are finished. "

Everyone laughed.

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