197: 197 Confession 1

197 Confession 1

Cocoa and I were really bored. Cocoa found a novel for me to read. I flipped open the first page of the book and it said," We've spent our entire life trying to get rid of the expectations of others and find ourselves." 0

I thought to myself that the first half of my life was about to run three times in the blink of an eye. The first half of my life had been floating and sinking, and they were struggling. The happiest time of my life had long been suppressed by the bottom of my memory. It would be a little difficult to find it. What else could I do? Life still had to continue. I had experienced all the happiness and unhappiness.

Perhaps I had been searching for myself all my life. A few years ago, I had been searching for my own way out. When I was studying desperately in The United States, I might only be worried about my meal money today and tomorrow's tuition. I could n' t think about my future at all. Later, when I returned to my country and wanted to avenge my sister, I was only doing my best to let those who were guilty receive the punishment they deserved. These things seemed to have ended.

I should have walked out of everything in the past, but in fact, after staring at the abyss for a long time, I couldn't remember what I was the most innocent. Perhaps one year, one month, one day, I met Zhao Qingyu original appearance.

If my life didn't end up like this, how good would it be? I would n' t be tortured by being addicted to Zhao Qingyu and my own love life. How could it not begin? What would it be like? I also couldn't predict that many things in life would be unavoidable.

Thinking back to today's half-awakened state, it was all Zhao Qingyu. He had occupied almost a large part of my life and even contributed to my life. However, such a person was about to, no, perhaps he had already left me. What should I do? Should I want to struggle like in my dream, or should I let go completely and bid farewell to everything?

When I thought of this, I really couldn't face it. If it was someone else's feelings, it might be easy for me to look at them from the perspective of a bystander. As long as I had the courage to do what I wanted to do, it would be fine. But in reality, when I faced myself, I couldn't do it. What should I do? How should I face this broken relationship? Or should they let go and have fun?

No matter which one, I found myself very fragile and hesitant. I didn't even have the confidence and determination to say it.

Just as I was in a daze, Cocoa looked at me and said," Ran, in fact, I was still hesitating about whether to ask these questions, but it seems that you haven' t given up on Zhao Qingyu. Yesterday, you didn' t go home. What happened to you?"

In the end, how did I answer Cocoa question? He and I didn't have anything to answer, so I told Cocoa that I was misunderstood and rejected by Zhao Qingyu again.

After thinking for a moment, I pretended to be relaxed and said," Cocoa, I summoned up my courage and found that many things were different from before. Zhao Qingyu to me, I don't know how to explain it. I might really not love him anymore."

After Cocoa heard this, she hugged me and sighed. After a while, Cocoa looked at me and said," Many times, I feel that Zhao Qingyu have feelings for you, but many times, I feel that he is very cold. "Ran, have you understood Zhao Qingyu?"

Cocoa asked me if I knew Zhao Qingyu. Actually, from the bottom of my heart, when I was living with him, I felt that I knew him very well. At that time, he did things calmly. Lei Lifeng did not hesitate at all. He could do anything, and he could handle it.

However, after leaving him, he gradually saw a different side. Although he was still very calm and had a set of principles for dealing with problems, he did not look so determined and had no flaws. He also had a soft and fragile side, as well as a family side and a disappointed side. Just as I was about to learn more about him, he didn't give me the chance to do so.

I thought for a moment, shook my head, and told Cocoa," Actually, I don't know him very well either. At first, I liked him because of my first encounter when I was young."

"At that time, I was still young and didn't know anything about love. The time I spent with Zhao Qingyu was extremely happy. At the same time, it was the most carefree moment in my life. We agreed on the future, but I disappeared."

Cocoa didn't expect that Zhao Qingyu and I would still have such a period of time and listened to it with interest.

"Later on, my parents forgot that I had to force myself to grow up when I was a teenager because of the sudden change in my family environment. At that time, my sister was staying at my uncle's house. I could only travel to The United States by myself to support myself. I thought I would never see Zhao Qingyu again in my life, but do you know that fate is sometimes funny?"

My eyes were filled with despair and sorrow. Cocoa just looked at me like this, trying to comfort me, but I couldn't do anything. All I could do was listen to me tell me the secrets that had been sealed in my heart, the dark secrets that could not be seen.

Let me tell myself. If I tell you, perhaps I won't feel so depressed in my heart. If I tell you, I wo n' t have to pretend to be in front of Cocoa all the time. I won't have to pretend that I' m a girl who doesn't live in the world anymore. In fact, I' m a person who has been wandering in the abyss I can be said to be extremely tired.

"Why did you come back?" Cocoa looked at me and asked.

"Why did you come back?" Perhaps after hearing this, you would find it very dramatic, but in reality, I'm telling you, Cocoa these things happened to me. Why did you come back? "Because of my sister's illness and her revenge, Nian Niannian was a very cute girl before, but now she's like this. That's why I' ve returned home."

"Do Zhao Qingyu know about all of this? Does he know that you're the girl he knew before?" Cocoa helped me dry my tears and held me in my arms, listening to what I said.

"He doesn't know." I smiled, a look of despair and misery on my face." I do n' t know who I am. He has always treated me as a Substitute, my own Substitute!"

My tears fell uncontrollably. Wang Keke hugged me in his arms, patted my back gently, and comforted me," Ran, all of this has passed. Let's forget about it, alright, let's not talk about it. We want to think about tomorrow and the future."

I could vaguely feel Cocoa crying on my back. My voice was choked with sobs." Ran, from now on, you have me and my brother. We are your family. No matter what happens, we will always be by your side."

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